Victim of your fame
by UnguidedAngel
Summary: Short angsty fic **Taito**, prequel to Celebrated Victim. Read and Review if you will


This is the prequel to 'Celebrated Victim' which was a nice short Taito fic, this is going to be the same. Don't like the idea of Taito? Then please leave. No I don't own Digimon or any of it's characters.  
  
  
  
"..Victim of your fame"  
  
Yamato Ishida sat opposite the Kamiya's apartment on Hightenview Terrace, blonde locks of hair occasionally obscuring blue eyes from the scene infront of him. The young man he had loved for years now was leaning over his little sister, trying to pry something, probably a video game out of her hands. Even after all these years of practice Taichi could never manage to get anything from Hikari's grip. A soft smile played over Yamato's lips as he considered walking over there, maybe giving his tenshi one final hug, one final kiss goodbye. Dispite his smile a single crystaline tear escaped the side of his eye and travelled almost painfully over his pale skin.  
  
Reaching into a denim pocket he felt for a piece of paper, this was the hardest thing he had ever written the words hadn't reached him until he had seen his Taichi with his own eyes. He had sat dangerously close to the edge of the balcony and wrote down his feelings, his prayers, his reasons, his last goodbyes. His heart ached when he had first got to this spot, he had often wondered if him and Tai were connected somehow, he had always wondered if Tai knew when he was thinking about him. For the past few weeks Tai had hardly left his side, complaining about something being wrong. 'Oh god Tai.. if only you knew..' A soft sound disturbed his thoughts as he looked down into his hand to find a crumpled letter to his angel. "Damnit.." he quietly cursed, not believing he didn't notice his grip tighten like that. Getting out his bad he looked back up with blurred vision to the beauty ahead of him, always so graceful, so loving, so deserving of more than Yamato could give. Taking a deep breath he yet again began to write.  
  
~~~~  
  
Dear Taichi..  
  
If you've gotten this.. I'm gone. And before you let your hot head get the better of you, just read this! Please! It's my last goodbye to you, and I didn't want to go without in some way saying goodbye.  
  
Words.. you'd think they'd come easy to someone like me wouldn't you? well, other people would, you knew different. I could never say what I felt.. I even had to wait for you to make the first move because my pride got in the way of saying that I loved you that first time. Thanks to you Taichi, that's got a lot easier. You know I love you, it took until I tried to kill you for me to realise it, but I love you. You're the reason I've suffered for so long my love, if it wasn't for you, I would've gone long ago. I tried to hang on to that last bit hope, tried to cling to your strength, but I can't do it anymore.  
  
I'm falling from heaven, angel.. and I'm dragging your innocent soul with me, I can't do that anymore. This is going to sound so shallow Tai, but all of it just got too much, the pressure from the band, school, my agent, my fans, my family. They all expected too much of me.. so much.. You know me Tai. I hate to disappoint anyone, especially Takeru and you. But I can't help it! Everyone expects everything from me! I'm just a kid Tai! Just a kid..! And all they're all doing is treating me like some unstoppable force, like I'm not effected by anything and no matter what they do I'll always be ready for more.  
  
Well no more Taichi-kun.. no more.. I'm so tired.. I've been getting paler and thinner, my body and my soul are giving up on me, so I'm going to give in while I'm still a shell of my former self... and don't blame yourself... you noticed something was wrong. I just refused to allow your courage to pull me out of this place, when I'll just fall back in anyway, making you weaker and weaker each time.  
  
I'm an ugly parasite in your beautiful world, and it's about time that I let you regain the strength that you once had. Keep hold of your strength and beauty and get someone who you can share that strength with without having to sheild them from everything, someone who can stand on that beautiful pedastool with you.  
  
  
  
Bye my love.. maybe one day we'll meet again.. please.. keep safe.. and be happy.  
  
Yamato.  
  
~~~  
  
Though tempted to write more, the young singer couldn't bring himself to do it, tears were starting to blotch the ink on the white paper so he quickly folded it and placed it, along with his pen, back into his pocket, lifting his arm to wipe away the tears at his eyes, never being one for showing such emotion so openly. The smile was yet again on his face as he looked up and whispered. "Goodbye my love.. soon enough.. we'll both be free.."  
  
Turning away from Hikari and Tai, he made his way slowly back down the stairs, trying to ignore the tugging of his heart strings as he turned the corner. His breathing becoming heavy as he battled with himself, his eyes closing against the breeze. He almost lost himself in the streets of Odaiba, the odd shout of his name bringing him back to reality. A forced smile, a wave, the occasional signature was all he had to do before he got to his brother's door. He could hear the younger blonde's light hearted laughter as he silently lifted the mail box lid, placing all of his notes inside them, knowing fully well that his mother would be awake and check the mail before his father even bothered thinking of coming home..  
  
He stretched out his pale fingers and gently touched against the door, the warmth that it emitted feeling almost alien to him, and yet so recognisable, it felt.. safe.. like laying in Tai's arms and watching the sun set, pointing at clouds in the park, sharing the same ice cream and snuggling up in the same bed. It was incredibly tempting, but if there was one thing Yamato Ishida still was, it was stubborn. He shook his head and stepped away from the door and it's warmth, turning back into the cold and making his way home.  
  
~~~  
  
Less people recognised him on his way home than on his way to Takeru's and he was silently greatful for it. He stepped back into the empty apartment that he and his father shared and walked straight to the bathroom, looking himself in the mirror as if readying himself for a pep-talk. "Alright.. this is it.. set us both free Yamato.." those words brought a smile upon his face and he brushed his hair back into place, dark green jeans and a pale green top covered his body, he wanted to remind himself of happier times, times before all this fame crap.  
  
He pushed open his bedroom door and opened the curtains infront of some french windows, the pale light of the moon cascaded over the interior of the room and he enjoyed this serenity. His bed was almost framed by this celestial light, the sky was clear, the stars were visible, as if the sky was inviting him to join it in eternity, and so he would. Sitting on his soft bed he reached for the pre-positioned tablets and took them, letting himself lean over the bed, give them enough time to work. "I love you Taichi Kamiya.." he said almost silently, tears yet again pushing their way to the surface of his being. "I love you.." He began to feel a little dizzy, his head kept falling forward as if he was falling asleep standing up, which in a way, he was. He span his legs onto the bed, he wasn't sure how long had passed since he took those tablets, but he knew he didn't have long in the world of consciousness and that his father wouldn't be back for hours and by then.. he'd be long dead. His hand feebly reached to take hold of a necklace charm that Tai once gave him, it was his symbol of Friendship, almost framed by Tai's symbol of Courage. He closed his eyes and placed his other hand by his side as the shadows seemed to creep into his very soul..  
  
"I love you Taichi.."  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
Owari... well.. that was the end.. A weird way of doing a story.. but.. I think it worked.. hopefully you all enjoyed it too, and yes, I got emotional while writing this one too.. maybe I'm becoming soft in my old age.. ~smiles slightly~ Well.. please review..  
  
~ The Unguided Angel. 


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